The Sky never was the Limit...with God

Ramblings and reflections of one growing in stature and wisdom and in his walk with God :)

5:27 PM


Etched by Isaac

Now I know what it feels like to go through physiotherapy. In the world of limitations set by your own body, it's easy to get depressed and just give up. THAT is the moment you have to push harder and persevere in order to achieve a breakthrough i.e., a better record in movement or strength.

Every day involves me doing physiotherapy now, and it is practically as hard as muscle training, if not more saddening, as you're constantly reminded of what your limitations are, and when those limitations are but an shadow of what your limitations once were, you'll realise sooner or later that it's going to take a while to get back to your old self.

I reached 173 degrees yesterday! Last Wednesday, I was at 140 degrees. (180 degrees means arm fully extended above the head, whilst lying down) The tendons and muscles vibrate like crazy, and it feels like my arm is going to break off but I push on in hope of playing badminton faster than predicted (roughly a year off to regain range of motion and strength)

After I reattain the range of motion, it will be time to work on strengthening the shoulder muscles, then only to build those muscles up to normal and to strengths beyond that. It will probably be somewhere in February at least to reach sub-normal strength.

Sometimes I wonder whether it would have been better if I opted out from surgery and just did muscle training instead. I wouldn't have to go through all this now - wearing the sling, super stiff shoulder, trouble bathing, eating, wearing clothes - I have been wearing button-down shirts for almost four weeks now. Simple things like lifting a spoon with my left hand, opening a door, lifting a cup of water, writing my name by hand; things so simple that I took them for granted, now taken away, and when I achieve each milestone, I celebrate my accomplishment and good fortune. It makes me much more thankful for what movement I do have. A timely reminder indeed from God to treasure what I've been entrusted with and also to take better care of this body that I am steward of.

The doctor set a goal for my physiotherapy - to be able to lift up my hand vertically all the way (like answering a question) by six weeks. The physiotherapist, when I met him, said that I had already reached the movement range of those who had done physiotherapy for four weeks, in the 2.5 weeks I had had after surgery, which is very good. I was pretty happy to hear that, for I had been literally pushing myself since the surgery. It took two whole days to lift up my fist (contract the bicep), and that was a gargantuan effort. I've come a long way since then.

Time flies indeed and I'm getting used to being stared at in the train, at IMU, at church, and everywhere I go. Also, my count stands at three medical students and one Doctor who have said that my right arm is injured instead of my left arm (which I really cannot comprehend till this day - obviously the arm in the sling is the injured arm right?) But I digress. This expensive piece of sponge is specialist equipment and is very rare over here apparently, so I'm like doing a good job of increasing awareness and exposure of the general public to the various types of healthcare armslings.

This surgery allowed me to practice writing with my non-dominant hand, which has produced plenty of awkward child-like squiggles, but overall not too bad, considering the time put in to practice. I'm still pushing it, and perhaps one fine day I will be ambidextrous. Hahahaha but I doubt that will happen. Time will tell.

The one thing I am not allowed to do is to take the bus. This means forking out roughly RM5 for a taxi ride on some days and it saddens me. =/

On the brighter side, apparently I can type on the laptop keyboard with one hand as fast as the average two-handed typist, and when using the phone, I can type faster than most people using two hands (thank you Swype). Shower time has been cut down from 55 minutes to 11 minutes (that is the record) including dressing properly.

At times the shoulder behaves well, and I forget it's injured, until I move my arm.
At times it throbs and throws tantrums. Plus two of my fingers are still partially numb as a result of neuroplexy according to the doctor. It should go away. Eventually..

I miss playing badminton. A lot.
I miss having my arm as usual.

No point complaining. Have to work on physiotherapy and get it back together. Praying for strength and discipline to study as well. One's studies should not be affected by one's mood, but at times, it does happen.

Time to go push the limits again. Signing off.

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