The Sky never was the Limit...with God

Ramblings and reflections of one growing in stature and wisdom and in his walk with God :)

10:54 AM

Some ramblings

Etched by Isaac

Once again, here I am, way past my bedtime, blogging. It's 2.22am, and I'm starting to give up hope on ever correcting my biological clock to sleep at more reasonable times. Also, it's February now, which means a few things: (1) time flies, and (2) Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day are coming soon, both of which will flood Facebook with pictures of things I will not be able to participate in. Ah well.

Neurology has passed, and I'm now in Dermatology. As expected, there's a lot of skin to look at, which makes a pleasant change from too much brain in the previous rotation. I really seriously considered dermatology as a specialty choice but right now I'm not so sure. Let's just get through medical school first I guess.

Life's drama seems to be never ending. I've been embroiled in a battle to save my photos from theft + educate some fellow medical students on the importance of intellectual property rights (copyright for photos in my case). Have I learnt anything from this whole fiasco? Yeah I guess. I've lost much of my goodwill towards man in this part of the world, which is unfortunate, but not unexpected. This place absolutely reeks of entitlement syndrome. Kinda saddening actually. From now on, if I ever shoot any photos for any events, I will make my watermark painful to remove, and now I actually know the laws that govern intellectual property rights. Maybe I'll write out the whole story one day. Probably won't be good publicity for the involved parties though. But do I care? I ask myself that question quite a lot. I really don't know - and that scares me a little. Loyalty to this institution? Hmm. Good question. But at least now I know my photos are good enough to be stolen. Ironically it's a compliment albeit a very annoying one.

Every single day I tell myself I will do something productive, and every single day (almost la), I fail to achieve that goal, at least academically. I guess today was slightly more productive - at least I wrote out some drugs for the formulary. I think I'm going to try and get that out of the way as soon as I can. Have to write up a whole GP report and finish up my IRP data table as well this month, in addition to studying for the specialties. The amount of non-studying time I'm doing is incredible. I cannot keep doing this. I have to study. At least that's what I tell myself now (and I end up doing something else later, yet again. Argh.). Saw another case of hidradenitis suppurativa today. The smell stinks. Seems to be yet another disease which has modifiable risk factors that patients have trouble modifying - smoking and excess weight. I still maintain my view that a large chunk of healthcare budgets go towards diseases which are mostly self-inflicted. Taxpayers' money! But if humans weren't human, they wouldn't be humans. Ah well.

Recently, a Facebook friend commented on my latest food album, saying that whoever's my future wife is a very lucky woman. She followed that up with a question as to whether that's my strategy (to attract a future wife). I chuckled to myself because honestly here my cooking is mainly to survive, and becaue I can't afford to eat out, and I like eating food, so... have to learn how to make nice food if I want to eat nice food. But yeah, my future wife will probably be a food fan. I foresee a lot of eating in our lives. Hahahaha. I daresay that my current proficiency in cooking is greater than the average medical student. But then again, I spend a lot more time cooking than the average medical student (who will probably have more medical knowledge than me).

Emotional seesawing is rife nowadays. I swing from being happy to being somewhat upset/cynical about the healthcare systems in the world, to being nonchalant/ignorant, to being nostalgic for the golden olden days. Have I ever reconsidered my choice of career? I guess so. Fortunately (or unfortunately, I'm not sure), I can't see myself doing anything else. Nothing seems to be as interesting or as fulfilling as medicine although the hours, responsibility, and expectations are crazy, and the pay isn't wonderful. I must be a workaholic at heart to even consider doing medicine in the first place. I doubt it's a profession for anyone who is actually really lazy. I also doubt that there are any medical students who have never reconsidered their MBBS choice. But this might just be the cynical me.

Has God been good throughout this whole time? Of course. I have to remind myself to give thanks and praise Him for all that He's done. I am extremely lucky and blessed to be right here, right now, doing what I am, with what I have. I am blessed. Thoroughly blessed. Sometimes I kick myself for grumbling and complaining. It's just that sometimes I feel down. The weather here doesn't help either. Cold bites and rain dampens the soul. I am in more need of spiritual growth, methinks. Should really spend more time reading the Bible and praying, and also following up on sermons.

I guess my current problem is procrastination, which might just be the greatest fault with the current generation of young people. We don't do what we know we should do - we fail to recognise the importance of sowing seed now to reap in the future - we live for the current moments instead. I try my best to break away from the mould, to not conform to the ways of the world, but it is difficult. Not that I expected it to be easy. Nobody said it would be easy. But the Bible says that it will be worth it. And thus far, the Bible hasn't been wrong, to me. God has never been wrong. And for that, I am truly blessed.

Much prayer is needed for the world, my country, and the humans of today.
And sometimes, we all need to remember to pray for ourselves, that we may be strong, and be able to uphold others. But if we don't take care of ourselves first, it's going to be tough to take care of others.

And with that thought, I shall end this post because it's 2.50am now and I should sleep although tomorrow is effectively a holiday owing to the fact that I can do my IRP anywhere I have the Internet. But I shall sign off with a picture of my bed, which I made, for a very happy change. 

My bed has never been this neat. It reminds me of a Paddle Pop or a marshmallow. Hahaha =D

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